Since mid-February, the venerable Journal of Universal Rejection has taken us behind the scenes of their rigorous article review process - a review so exacting that no article has yet managed to pass through to publication.
By way of evidence, consider the short story Done, which - despite extensive changes made as required - was still rejected by reason of impatience. Consider the author's beautiful words explaining why a speaking monkey was not actually a speaking monkey:
The monkey is not in our world, but in a virtual reality, and thus not speaking at all. Indeed, the illusion of monkey-speak in this story is a postmodernist reflection on the collective cultural delineation of "speech" in contrast to the abstract notion of "silence" highlighted by appearing within artificial quotes in a story with no true dialog. It is a literary device representing man's struggle to be heard.